Just Thinking

 

So I guess I haven't really updated this in a few days but anyway so "he" texted me merry Christmas which is actually very sweet and nice meaning he was thinking about me : ) and I must admit this boy is very different just the feel of how were talking I mean I really am trying not to over think this and let things happen in due time im trying to think about now and not so far in the future but it's hard not to. That's why everytime I remember I have to keep it in the Lord's hands and trust in his guidance.

Also should I text him happy new years?

Another thing is his MF'in age if hes 19 this is CRAZY!!!!!!!

Age is just a number…. Right?

 

Ok so another thing that worries me is his age I really do not know how old he is and that kinda worries me. Im like an old fart with no care in a freaking dorm with a bunch of fresh man

OMG

 

He texted me Merry Christmas!!!!!!!! Yes Lord thank you lol I was so worried that I weirded him out and that he wouldn't even want to text me anymore. But only you know Lord which direction this swill head and I want to place it in your hands LORD you know the plan. But thank you Lord for this.

It’s Official

 

Today I was in a Christmas play with my cousins and I never realized how awkward I really am… Smh…if im awkward and shy around my own cousins then imagine how awkward I am around other boys. And ive known my cousins my whole life. Well I just pray I can grow out of that are else there really is no hope for me LORD HELP and I mean that… Im over that boy cause I've decided he reminds me to much of my cousin Mark. There features and the way they act. Also another thing that I noticed about myself is that I might be just a little shallow. Which is crazy and I pray that spirit out of me Lord.

    Dear Lord,

Please help me overcome this and find a good man in the year 2012. I no I pray this over and over and I will try my best not to be continuously repetitive because you are God and already know my desires so my job ends with faith. I place my concerns and hopes over to you about a man. I also pray for a higher self esteem and a confidence that does not cross over to conceit.

Im Over It

Im soo over it…. If it happens than it happens. I need to stop rushing things and hoping for things in due time things will happen I just have to have faith in God that I will find that someone I may be far from that goal but at least im on the path towards that goal and I just hope I can remember this.

Prayer

Lord I have faith that you will find that person for me I have faith in you that I will find happiness. Lord I have faith in your plan that I will find my future partner with your blessing prayerfuly…. Or maybe a "Mr-Right-Now" ; )

Ah-Hah

O

 

Ok so I've still been thinking about…. Well I bet u can guess…. The "Guy" lol so I think the issue was when he suggested things I basically turned them down without suggesting other things to do. It wasn't as if he didn't plan on chilling its just I wasn't suggesting anything in place of it. Also I read somewhere that girls tend to kill the gazing into the eye thing. SOO I need to lay off on that and just talk. I need to ask questions and lead to another conversation…. Man I wish I knew. If I had at least suggested things he probably would have stayed. AWWW shucks.

Well anyway If God blesses me with another opportunity with him especially or another guy I pray that I can at least master that mistake now that I recognize him . LORD help I do not want to be an awkward over thinking girly girl or that is definitely how I will be single for the rest of my life.

 

Prayer

Lord im asking for encouragement and perhaps if its meant to be to place me back in a position where I can talk to him or at least meet another guy that is actually worth spending time on. Please Lord help me give me the words to say and the comfort to say them. I need you more than ever and I want nothing more for your blessing and guidance in my relations with guys. Help me please and please except this prayer. I will avoid "certain" things in hope of these situations with a guy.

Why???!

 

    Why do I keep thinking about this one guy in particular…? i don't even know why I keep thinking about him honestly.